Do you believe in love at first sight?

I’ve always looked at other people who said they fell in love with their wife or partner the first time they saw them and admired it. I’ve always taken a while to decide.

When I was writing my book on farming woman called She’ll Be Right, I interviewed a woman who’s story got cut near the end – but her story remained one of my favourites. She first met her future husband when she was seven. He was almost fifteen years older than her. She met him, then came home to her mother and said “I have met the man I am going to marry”

She said she watched him date other women, but knew that he was the one for her. They would go out on the farm together, and she would listen to him talk about girlfriends but she said she felt an unshakable faith that he would eventually realise she was the one for him.

I’ve always had a ” there are plenty more fish in the sea approach” and I continue to think it’s important. In the last two years I’ve felt a mega connection on meeting three times- and the connection wasn’t enough- one guy was married, another not available and the third – well we’d barely met, and he was in a bar…. and I had a friend who needed me more.

I wouldn’t say any of these were love at first sight- but they were definitely connection at first sight. But connection isn’t enough. It’s just one step away from google stalking the pants off them, printing out their photo and spending the day staring at it wishing things were different, or worse, creating scenarios where I meet them again and again, turning it all into something it really shouldn’t be.

I do believe in connection at first sight. And it can feel like love.

However I also know it’s not the deciding factor on progressing things further- it is just one factor- and already having a relationship tends to trump instant connections!

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